If you’ve decided that you’re ready to have sex but you don’t know what to expect, this article is definitely for you.
First things first, I need you to be sure you’re doing this for you and not because one guy has talked you into it or not because you think “everyone is doing it” because trust me, not everyone is doing it. If you’re not sure yet, don’t let anyone give you pressure. If you want to go ahead, here’s what to know.
- Use a condom
You don’t want your first time having sex to end up with you being pregnant or catching an STD. You’ll regret it for the rest of your life.
- It won’t be like the movies or novels
It’s not going to be “magical”. You will not be transported into Utopia. Don’t have any expectations because people’s experiences are different. For some it is painful while others didn’t really feel any pain; just a slight discomfort. Also, not everyone bleeds their first time or even enjoys the sex so if this is you at the end of your session, know that it’s normal.
- Make sure your partner is someone you’re comfortable with
You need to be able to relax when having sex especially because it’s the first time. If you’re not comfortable and at ease, it’s going to hurt. You need someone that can go easy on you so you don’t feel any pain.
- Get lube
Lube makes everything better. Including him sliding into you. You’re very tight there and so he may struggle with pushing himself into you. Using lube makes the whole process easier and bearable.
- Share your boundaries
This is why you need someone you can trust and are comfortable with. Let them know where you’re uncomfortable being touched and where you want to explore. When you don’t like something they’re doing, gently redirect them to another part of your body you want them to focus on.
- Don’t be fake an orgasm
It is normal to not get an orgasm the first time you’re having sex. Don’t pretend you’re reaching an orgasm when you don’t feel anything because this only increases the orgasm gap. If he didn’t make you cum but he did, why do you want him to have a false sense of pride?
- It might be painful
There’s a good chance that your first time will hurt. After a couple of times, it will get better and you’ll start to enjoy it more.
- Focus on foreplay
Touch each other, make out, kiss and dry hump each other. It’s important you keep the foreplay going so you are naturally lubricated. By the time you actually have sex, everything will feel much better.
- Stay in the moment
I know it’s easy for your mind to wander about numerous things when making out or actually having sex but you’ll need to consciously focus on how good you’re feeling and enjoy it. Don’t think about how your body looks or wonder about what he thinks about your body. It’s not necessary.